In love???

Hey.. it's been such a very long time since I last wrote for my blog. I have many things to share with but I'm to bust to tell.. Now that I'm having a holiday, I'm going to take this opportunity to tell what's deep inside my head..

Well, actually I'm still having my clinical posting. But, for the chinese new year, we're having a one week holiday. I'll resume my duty for another 5 weeks (i guess) before my final exam.. Ohh~ SCARY.. hahaha.

As usual, I hate posting so much.. except for the sem1 that brought me soo many breathtaking experiences.. I think i can write a novel. haha.. ^^ Yes, the doctors, they love me. Some even call me 'love' even that he's like my uncle.. but i just consider it as a father talking to her daughter..
This time, I've met the same doctor that I've been following to whatever he's up to. But, just feeling awkward after knowing that he's a friend of my cousin.. and he's married. That's not the thing that I'm worried about since I don't want to end in a serious relationship with a Kelantanese.. Ok.. so we were being 'awkward' the whole time.. Luckily that I'm not working at thee same ward as he is. So we'll just see each other saying thank you,helping some sorts of things and I set off..

The weird story is that the doctor that my friend is madly in love with is watching me.. I don't want to make things any worse but I just don't know what to do. He keeps on staring me, smiling and his eyes watched me wherever I go. It's not that I dont wanna be friends with him or what. But I feel awkward. Coz he's the one who calms me down when I was crying in the pantry alone after being scolded with the WITCH I've been telling you previously a long time ago.

My friends said that he admires me. He'll always smile and stares and when I walk behind him, he'll turn to face me.. Not backing me up..  My best friend are jealous when i told this to her. (other BFF) she asked me to go on with it. It's not everytime someone who's nice and respects you would be in front of your eyes. Giving support. Yeah I thinks maybe she's right. My mum told me the same thing.
He's an Ireland graduate. Polite, caring and everything that girls wants in this era. Should I just accept him or just ignore him?? 
I'm in a huge dilemma..  I just don't know what to do.
But I also doesn't really understand what he really wants. What does it means behind his actions? Maybe it's just his attitude that's always like that?? Hmm
the time I knew that he admires me my heart was like..  filled with flower?? I SUPPOSE?? haha

One more thing that I'm afraid off.. My cousin will be doing his housemanship in this very same hospital that I'm working in.. I don;t want him to know anything about this. Coz, he'll tell the whole thing to my family.. Oh god please don't let this happen..
Maybe it's puppy love?? My friend had told me. Wherever I go, there must be someone who falls for me. Either one or sometimes more, fighting over for me behind my back. It's that I the one who never notice about it. I'm just feeling like I'm the uh.. Aphrodite?? haha
So I'll just let it go. See what happens next.. If we were meant to be, then I would just take it..

Life as a Nursing Student

Hey guys..
It's me again..

yeah.. i know that I'm away for some time but I'm BACK AGAIN!!!!

It's not that I dont want to update this blog but I'm just too tired..
I've been posted in Selayang Hospital for about 12-13 weeks!!!
OMG!!









main lobby of selayang hospital..


This is where I've been all this while.
To me (after THE POSTING HAS ENDED) it's not all that bad.. It's kind of like okaylah..
But it's like hell back in there actually.. ^^

Being a student nurse is not all about taking the crosses needed  to sit for OSCE test.. But to me, it's like gaining experiences,gain knowledge and taking care to those in need..

There, I learn how to take care of the Geriatric patients (elder). But most of the time, we need to be calm when treating them. Some of them could be aggresive towards anyone. Especially the health care workers.

I've been to many wards, 1st class, medical ward, urology and many more.
I've met a lot of doctors. Doctor with various attitude, some could take students and some are not.
And the thing that I hate the most is when the HO's (houseman) or doctor in training are rude towards the patients and student nurses. as if they were good enough. Whereas the specialist was very kind.. Well, that was confusing.
well, this is Dr. Ricahard.I met him when I was assigned in ward 4C palliative ward. He's a specialist. Some say that he doesnt like students. But luckily he didnt say anything nor scold me during my posting in the ward. (I didnt do anything wrong)


Well, for people like me (who doesnt like nursing at all) It's quite challenging. But I'll try to do my best to get good result for my diploma in nursing. After that I'm going further.. Bachelor in Science in John Hopkins University.. Wish me luck for that..

Well, to all the petients, get well soon..

and to you guys.. take care  for your health.. It's the most important thing in life.. 

 

 

What is Life???

I always remember "Life is a Race".
be the the first or you'll be trampled..

But someone also has thought me to be the best and success will follow..
That means what we have to do is be the best and success will follow..

I think that's really true but to do our best is not that easy..
My life is to fulfill my parent's dreams.
To make them happy..
They are my only hope as I do to them..
I just love them and I would do everything to make them happy
But most of the times I forgot and enjoy my lives, but when the time comes, I'll shed my tears
because i can't really fulfill what I've promised to them..
Mum, dad
Always remember and always know that I'll always love you..
without you I'm no one..
For your love that makes me stand to live..

I love you mummy, daddy.. ^^

Long Distance Love

I just state about what I feel here..
In my previous post, I've wrote about someone that I really miss and I wanna see him but I just don't have the chance because we're both far away from each other..

I knew him a few years ago through a social website. It's kinda Facebook but it's not.
At first I just thought him just like a brother because he;s older than me..
Then, I started to start to send mails, post on pictures.. and so on..
But I dont think that he do thought me as his 'sister'. He always hope for a relationship.
He's very sweet. He'll advise me, encourage me to do something better and he always be so sweet to me.. He used to end our e-mails with xoxo.. everytime..

What do you think about what he think??
Does he love me??

I just hope he did.. and I wonder whether he misses me or not??


I just hope that we will meet sooner or later as I've promised..
Do you think  a long distance would work??

If u think of something don't be afraid to leave a comment because I just kept thinking about this thing even in class!! I just can't concentrate when I remember about him..

Missing You~~

I just don't know why I just can't forget him though that it's been a very long time since I last contact him. It's about 2 to 3 years ago..
   I've forget him and before but I don't know how and why, I just dreamed about him 2 weeks ago. And I can't forget that 'dream' till now. It left me a strong feeling.. I just don't know how to describe but, I dreamed about him about 3 to 4 times straight in just a few days..(LESS THAN A WEEK!!!)

*sigh..
According to what I heard (my friend's said) if we dreamed about someone ( a person that you know), about 3 times straight, that means that the person was meant for us..

I just dont know.. I dont know how to believe about that thing..
But I just can't forget him.. 
I just dont know what does it mean..
Maybe he misses me..  I just dont know ..
 I really hope that someday I will have the answers for this..
For the time being, God!! Please help me..


This is the place that i can express my feelings and my problems..
So please don't take it so much..

Till next time..

A girl in dilemma...

College Life..

I dont know what I do feel now. I was just thinking about my future,My exam results..
The exam result for other course for healthcare students had been released last week.. But for my course it just didnt appear yet..

Many of my friends have problems with their CGPA..
Most of them dropped their CGPA and others have to re-sit the examination..
Though that my previous result are quite 'good' but I'm just scared of it that it would dropped and tak naik-naik... Matilah aku kalau mcm tu..
sOMETIMES i JusT fEEl THAt I waNT TO be lIKe Spongebob.. LaUGHiNg All thE TiMe.. ^^

That's one thing

Another thing is that my friend since form5 that I knew just enrolled to this college..
I feel quite hap[py for it since we're quite close (as a friend only arh)
*if you guys think yang bukan-bukan, my oppa will marah you, hahaha..
I really hope that we can bergaduh mcm dalam kelas dulu..
Bergaduh about something that yang tak ada apa2 pun sebenarnya.. But dun know why lah.. Seronok plak buat macam tu.. haha If ada Harpreet, and Kartik lagi GEMPAK.. HAHAHAHUHUHU
If ONLY he didnt change college..
I understand that's what his parent's trying to do.
They would alway want the best for their children.. My mum and dad also would do the same...
It's just a few days here and my friend said that dia nak change college kan...
So what can I do... Fate decide where we r suppose to be going.. ^^

Hi.. again??

It's been a very long time since my last post.. I'm too busy and tired lah to blogging..
I was very busy posting in Selayang Hospital. It's quite fun working there. But still.. the 'witch' I've been telling you before starting to torture us!! Everyday, she'll make us feel very bored, hate to see her face. She'll make us cry. And I've cried once. I just don't know how to face this. However, it's been 4 weeks i've been tahan that perempuan gila. No wonder they semester 8 nursing students called her 'Puaka Niyang Rapik'. And yes, still. 'the nickname was sealed with her. I called her 'PNR' as an akronym for the Puaka Niyang Rapik. haha. serves her right. However I've taken precautions to stand right if she makes something to rosakkan aku. I don't care.
     The staffs there loves me.. haha.. But, next week I'll have to change ward... I won't be able to see my beloved doctors.. and staff nurses.. T-T... I'll blog about something that I love working there and why.. I'll take the chances.. Till then.. Bye.. ^^

Mum and Dad..

So many problems fall onto me.One by one.. Why life is always full of false hope? I just dont know what to do other than keep on crying and keep crying all those dull and .. *haisy.. Luckily I have my mother and father which is always with me all the times though that we live separately right now. I really hope I can live this apartment and go back to my mum and dad's arms..

The arms that always hold me tight to their heart. I don't need anything more than I do need them. I could cry and die without them but not my friends. My mum and dad are so important to me. In a simple word. I live, i breathe, i succeed for them. It's for their happiness. I really hope that I can be a professor like they do always hope I would be. I would sacrifice for grab it all in my hand and hand it them with honour and love.

I could live without my friends but not without you. I would feel down and sad without you.
I am nothing without you.
I love you mummy, daddy..
My love is just for you. Not somebody else.
I'll try to make you proud daddy, mummy..
I hope that your love to me would not fade away but .lies with me eternally.
And so my love for you.. ^^

Posting in Selayang Hospital

After the Deepavali 1 week, holiday we're sent to Selayang hospital. Here, I was assigned to the medical ward. Mainly are elders and this is Man's ward. OMG! I dont know what to say bcoz we have to clean them, feed them and so on. The doctors are cute (male doctors) and the wad sister's nice to me EXCEPT FOR OUR Clinical Instructor (C.I)!!! She's like a witch!! Cruel. Not a single smile on her face. Pilih Kasih and what arh? Too many kejahatan that she makes me crazy everytime i see her. Sometimes she's ok. Depends on her mood lah. These girls called her 'nenek sihir'. hahaha And I know she doesnt really like me. So what? I have my own life. The doctors liked me, the staff nurse and the ward sisters. They'l teach me and give me something to do to help them. And I'm happy to work with them. Especially when something funny happen that once I 'tergelek' the doctor's feet with the patients's bed.. hahaha.. Till 4 times!!! OMG~~ Now, I just feel like want to run away when I see him. hahaha. But, he seems to like me. He makes jokes and i dont know. Fooling around. Doctor also got yang perangai macam aku ni. see. Bukan aku sorang ja yang gila macam ni.. hahaha..

 Oklah. dah banyak cakap ni. tapi tak habis lagi. Nanti i sambung in thje next post. I hav to prepare for posting.. Meet that psycho doctor again.. hahaha. bye now..

^^ Love you..

Holly-holiday..

Deepavali is coming which means holly-holiday!!!  hahaha.. Today is my last day of posting at Sentul Medical Center. I'll be heading back to my house tomorrow.. I'll need to do some shopping to maintain myself.. My hair-mask and evrything.. I'll need some moment to myself.. To pamper myself after such a very long time. So many thing happened. And some even hurt my feelings. I just don't know how to tell and where to start. But I'll just let it slip for now coz I'm too tired to reveal it now. It's 11.31 pm or 23:31 almost midnite or twilight. I prefer midnight. Ok. just got to go to sleep now.. Goodbye world.. Good nite world. Got a new headstart tomorrow.. ^^

Timeless..

I really love to hang out and watch movies, shopping and even surf the net and blogging.. It's just that since I'm in posting, I dont really have much time to do what I want. Just spending time watching the patients, taking their vital signs and I'm very tired sitting in the hospital when there's no patient to observe. I'm very tired that I don't even have time to take care of myself. I dun eat nutritious food since all the food around me is not delicious :p. And I'm too tired too cook. I also doesn't have time to pamper myself with taking a hot bath, put on a face mask and so on when I started to live my college life.. I really hope that my Final exam will be over soon.. Just another 2 months before I'm free to live my own happy life.. hahaha ^^

Relax!!!

Tomorrow is sunday and my one day for rest in the whole week of posting. *sigh. Posting in Sentul Medical Hospital is very boring, tiring but sometimes it can be fun.. Foolin around like small kids and even gosipping.. haha. We even laugh at almost everything even that it's not funny. ( ME LAH..) haha but it's just one week past. Still got another 2 weeks before holiday and it's a long way to go.. Love to see the babies in the nursery asleep but hate it when they cry.. haha :p

Missing you..

Now I've to go for posting at Sentul Medical Centre for 3 weeks.. I have to work even on saturday!! That means I can't go home. Ohh~~ How I miss my mum, dad and my little sis soo much... That makes me think to hold them tight when I see them.. I just wanna go home. I just don't know why. But this is what I feel. I keep on thinking about going back home everyday, every moment and how much I miss them. I can't live without my family.. Because of this stupid shift that I have to work from 2pm to 9pm at nite! I dun want to burden my dad to fetch me at nite!! *sigh. I really hope that I can go home soon.. That is on the 15th Oct. A very long time for me.. I just want you to know. Mum, Dad and my siblings.. especially my little sis that you will always be in my heart... Love you eternally..

Oppa~~

I  miss my oppa rite now.. I've actually lost contact with him after he went for the National Service for 2 years.. Plus, the social web that we've been using to contact each other is banned for some reason that I don't know.
There is one other way for me to recontact with him but I just too scared.. It's by sending her friend an email asking for my oppa.. But, I'm afraid that  she'll be jealous and do something to my oppa.. Because his career is more to the image.. Haisy.. I'll remember all the things you told me. I'll always work hard to be success.. I practice my scales and evrything and take care of myself. You don't need to worry Oppa~~ I really hope that we can meet one day.. Always know that I will never forget you and I will always love you.. I hope that I'll be always be in your heart..

Royal Highness..

Hmm.. You guys must be thinking what it's all about this time. If I told you that I'm a part of a royal family you guys must be thinking that I've gone nuts!!! Is that rite?? Well, actually I'm. My mother came from a royal family. It's just that we didn't rule our own kingdom..

   I've been watching Barbie Princess Charm School.. And I'm surprised that the storyline was just about the same as my family's condition.  The true heir of the throne does not rule her own kingdom. But, of course the ending is different... Then I think again, I'm a princess( but now appear as a commoner), why should I worry about?? I won't have to worry about anything like ruling the kingdom or fighting for the throne. But, I miss living in the castle.. Too bad.. If I live in the castle, people should have call me 'Princess' or 'My Lady' (pronounced as 'mi-lady'..) I would have enjoy the luxury and everything.. But what can we do.. The heir is not on the throne, but taken over bu some other not pure royalty.. *Maybe it's our faith..

This is Blair, or 'Princess Sophia'.. The same girl which has the same faith as me. But, my situation here is that nobody knows that I'm a princess.. :p Think again.. 'I'm a princess and I don't need a crown'!!
Now I know why my mum always train me for poise,etiquette,style.. and so whatever.. I'm actually a princess.. A princess must always have character, confidence,be poise...Whatever it's i always know that I'm a princess..^^


psst: so, be careful, dun make me angry. If i put a curse on you. It might really happen.. Scaring you guys.. haha.. Till then..

Friendship???

          Isn't it nice if we could stay like this forever??

Best friends stick together. That's what I've always heard throughout my life. But, is it happen in real life? I dont think so. For me, most of what we call 'friends' are always with us for some reason. Maybe to share the popularity or the fame, or maybe just  be with you for something else that is good and  they can take advantages with.

*sigh..

                 I have always have friend s around me. it's just that I don't know what went wrong that they always try to stay away from me when there's nothing good for them. I've always been lonely for the past few years. Ever since I was still in the kindergarten.. No friends in the primary school, and just a bunch of chinese girls during the secondary school. I miss my high school.. Miss my friends. But do they really miss me??  Or do I just 'syok sendiri'..

 But, thank God I have met my friends in this college. I love spending my times with them. Laughing like mad.. We even studied together almost every nite in a fun way of course.. hahaha.
Still nothing is best when with the family at home..  Miss that moment soo much..

          Cousins... they are not really dependable.. Or should I say, they are 'talam dua muka' .. Nice in front, mengutuk di belakang. Backstabbers!! HATE IT!!

 I love this words.. If only it's true..

     True friendship that I experienced is when I knew this person.. He always be with me, advise me and console me when i need him the most.. I'm just very luckyto know him. And I'm not sharing his popularity of course. Coz I didnt know that he's popular before until I figure it out on my own...
Unfortunately, he's not in Malaysia here with me and I do miss him a lot....
   Whatever it's I will always remember your advices and I will always move on even when you are not around..

   My girlfriends, Intan, Anis,Kui Yin, Ekin and Suripah,for your times here with me.I will always appreciate that.. And if 1 day that we have to separate, always remember all the beutiful time together..

  My boyfreinds (normal fren only arh. nothing more): Thanks too Ee Kenn (Ikan),Harpreet (Moyang) and Kartik (Datuk) for the kutuk-mengutuk each other and for the fight every week in class and make the class so noisy till we made it to become popular.. hahaha.. I'll remember all those times..

So, backstabbers!! Stay Away FROM ME!!!


psst: Too emotional, just trying to let my emotions flow.. To be calm.. ^^ sorry..

College Life

As you know, I'm studying in Masterskill. Well, I'm not interested in nursing actually. But still, I try my best.. I don't want to make my parents feel bad..  Coz this is involves money. A lot of money. About 50k for me to complete my course..

Well, it's kinda fun during the practical session, coz the lecturer seems to like me. I got quite a good mark in the test given too..  Hmm.. We've been into a 'mock ward' last week and it looks like a real ward.. Guess what, we even have two of the METI-MAN.. Have you heard of it before?? It's a patient robot control by a computer system (apple) and it can breathe like asthmatic patient, can speak,cough,pass urine,have blood pressure and we can even put the IV Fluid (Intra-venous fluid) like a real human!!
 It costs 500k each.. Whoa~~ What a cost!! We've being told not to touch or do anything 'harm' to that robot.. haha

This is the METI-MAN.. See the IV Fluid over there?? It's in the vein of the robot.. Even robots have veins.. Weird isn't it.. 

This is the computer that controls the METI-MAN.. I took this picture when my lecturer is out.. haha.. we were like crazy taking pictures in the 'mock-ward' hahaha.. But when she comes, everybody hid their handphones. Including me.. hahaha See the white laptop over there?? That's the mainframe that control the METI-MAN.. Apple computers.. That's really expensive..

( fromleft: intan,suripah,anis and kui yin) Kui Yin looks differently in every pics..

These are my friends, and also my housemates.. My friends that is always gone crazy with me.. But I'm always crazier than them.. hahaha. This is in our 'mock ward'..

  In our lecturing room.. Lecturer's seat. While waiting for Mdm. Hafsah.. hahaha

Apart from of all of it. This is my new friend.. Tee Boon Yi.. I called her mom.. She had 8 husband and that means I have 8 daddies!! hahaha.. She always makes me laugh.. Whatever it is.. The way she laugh and everything.. The best part is when she sing a rock song for me with her head shaking that makes me laugh till I want to explode.. haha.. Kui Yin said that I'm suit with Boon Yi.. Because we're almost the same.. hahaha Besides her, I still have other friends. Namely, Pieka, Mira( same name as I do), Ieyla (my housemates).. And my other crazy group, Marvin,Nasir and Kui Yin and Boon Yi (we've always in one group)

Though that I didn't like nursing, but my friends here makes me stand longer.. I've thought about switching to Matriculation in Science or Dip in Pharmacy or  further my studies in form 6 because I receive a lot of offer.. But sadly, those offer letter arrive when I'm studying in Masterskill.. If I quit, I need to pay 10k now.. So, I need to proceed. I don't want to burden my parents.. Well, maybe after this course is finished, and still I dont have the interest in nursing, I'll proceed to another course either in Science or Arts.. My lecturer said that, we can directly go for degree if we want to change course. Because nursing is all about Science and Art...

Love,
Mira.. ^^
pSSt: lOVE YOU GUYS..

Weirdies..

There are so many things that human creates.. Most of them are useful to us. Some are pretty, nice and the designs are pretty cool.. But how about the weird things??

      The Japanese are known for their creativity and their intelligence. The 'device' they are creating are useful in some point of view but it's kinda weird.. haha.
Here's some of the weird things that I've found through the web..

 This is Japanese Baby Mops.. Make use of your hyperactive babies to clean your house.. Use them for good.. haha

And this is the butter stick.. Like a glue.. Sort of.. Convenience isn't it?? But remember to check your glue before spread it to your breaD!! haha

The Chin Rest.. Use it whenever you need and wherever go.. Easy.. But I won't use it!! So embarrassing..

Afraid to get your clothes dirty and wet when you walk during the rain?? This is the best solution.. Full Coverage!! hahaha :P

Want to sleep without leaning to other people next to you?? Use this..

Can't wait to have your meal?? This solves your problem.. Nice.. ^^

 Useful.. But it looks stupid.. haha

 Yummy baby... But cannot eat of course..


I wonder where do this people get the idea to make things like this??? hahaha
There are more than this, but I can't put it here of course.. I put it here just for fun..

Friends..

Well, after my last post i feel a bit relieved.. Thanks to my mum, my dad and my friends especially Intan, Anyss, Suripah(college mate) and Chan Ee Kenn, Tai Kui Yin and Tee Boon Yi for advising me and  taking care of me andso on. Thanks my dear.. I'll try to improve myself in the future and I'll also try not to repeat the same thing again..

Anyway, can you suggest me how to love reading and studying more than playing games?? haha.. sounds silly..
  

 I really wish that I'll love reading and studying and doing researches.. hahaha But no matter how many time i wish to shooting star (nagareboshi) it won't happen.. hahaha

 I can read for hours non-stop. But it's novels.. hahaha.. That's all for today.. Since the test weeks has ended, I'm happy.. At least I don't have to burn the midnight oil anymore.. haha (laziest girl on earth).. hahaha
Well, that's all for now. Going for dinner.. hahaha.. Nite..

One of the worst day of my life

Today, my lecturer announced our Behavioral Science I test 1 result... As always, i waited with excitement.. But then, when i realized that I wasn't one of the top scorers.. My tears rolled down my cheeks.. automatically that I ran into the toilet.. I cried and I cried.. Feeling guilty to my mum and dad.. Remembering that I promised that I will do my best in my studies.. I always try my best to do my best.. And most of the times, I'll try to be the best among the best..  


        But today, I feel bad.. A total moron.. I fell very bad.. I feel stupid, useless, weak, ashame.. That's all the words i can think off but none of them describe what i truly experience.. I cried for two hours till there are no more tears to roll.. Thanks to my friends who always be with me whenever i feel good and during the bad days.. I really appreciate it though i've never show it... Honestly, I love you guys.. I hope i can do the same when you guys feel bad...



        Well, i do tell my mum, but there's nothing she can do. She advised me, but sometimes, the words cut.. I know what she means but the words really cut.. To no one i can speak to... No shoulder for me to cry on.. I feel lonely, sad.. Yes, today I look down, not as cheerful as always.. But please don't get mad at me.. I'm really sorry.. There's no word i can describe my feeling.. If only i can have someone to share with..

       I promise myself that I won't give out.. Thanks to my BFF Christin Chin at fB.. for advising me.. I'll try my best so that i cAn BE THE BEST ONCE AGAIN...